I must say that the people and customers are still great! So far 99.9% of everyone that comes in is super nice. I'm really falling in love with the town and people of Nolensville! I love interacting with everyone. That being said I think we should have a law in this country that everyone is required to spend at least one year in the military and one year working as a server in a restaurant. Folks, you want to talk about helping our society. In 50 years you could literally map the social alchemy! The newfound respect and patience we would all have for one another would be unreal! Hell, we could be talking about world peace here! Most people are so nice and appreciative but there are some idiots out there. Very few have come in but there is one person that's killing me! I've got one woman, probably in her mid to late 30's with thighs like Mike Singletary, that tells me every time she's in (which is about once a week) that her "crock-pot bbq is still better than mine and everyone else around for that matter". After that she proceeds to tell me that pretty soon she’s going to open up shop, but for me not to worry because she's going to open in Nashville.........-oh, thanks hun, I appreciate that! Now, it’s not the statement that is annoying, everyone thinks they have a better this or that, and I actually really appreciate that. Heck if none of us thought that there would be no restaurants around would there? Its the telling me the same thing once a week that is equivalent to a twisting fork in my eyeball.........."yeah lady, I heard you the first time". And let me tell you this, you think she's afraid to tell me this while she is simultaneously filling her head cave full of vanilla Moon-Pie?????? -NONE….NO FEAR! Anyway I smile, tell her I'll need to try it sometime, please come back (by the way, did you notice above how often she comes in?), all that stuff. Its times like this where I wish I truly didn’t care…I could just respond in the manner I saw fit. Here’s what it would look like:
Singletary: “Well like I told ya last week, my bbq is STILL better than yours, and all them other places too! There’s comin’ a time…..I’m telling you….when I’m gonna open up my own place. Course’ you aint gonna have to worry cause I’m lookin’ to open up in Nashville!
Me: “Wow, your right. You really should open up a crock-pot bbq place! Look, right over there across the street. That's a 1st Tennessee bank. When you get done cramming that Moon Pie down your fat head hole why don't you waddle you’re big ass over there so they can help you open up shop? Ya’ know I’ve got a better idea. Find a little town in France with street lamps. Maybe you could drain your back fat and sell it for lamp oil and then you could just pay for it outright? What do ya’ think?
5 comments:
I'll have you know, my dear, that there is a chance I will lose my job after how hard and loud I have laughed at the whole Moon Pie lady scenerio. You are one funny human being...let's just hope she doesn't read your blog.
I USED to know a guy named Pat who would have said that and not given it a second thought except for all the times he got to tell the story proudly.
I guess fatherhood or age has mellowed you a little!
Hang in there, maybe she will open up that restaurant soon and not have any extra time to come visit!!
Holly
Well sir, it sounds like you truly have yourself a stalker. Sounds like you can outrun her even paralyzed, but a stalker nonetheless. I wouldn't worry too much. Sounds like she's eating any profits she was hoping to get by opening a store. I hear they have crock pot cook offs ALL THE TIME, so...no...wait a minute...I've actually NEVER heard of a crock pot BBQ cook-off. Seen commercials for Kingsford charcoal and open pit Q's, but guess ESPN hasn't quite grasped the crock pot cook off fever. It's just not as exciting as her professional sport she's involved in called "pack your ass into spandex shorts to give kids a clue what the moon looks like up close". That's MUCH MORE INTERESTING! Take it easy brother! Be sure NOT to ever call or write so I know where to send the license plate YOU asked for because I'd hate for you to lose your reputation of leaving me hanging for months on end. Hell, John McCall calls me more than you do and that's saying something.hahaha! Love you!
Russ
P-Rock:
I just heard you are in the Nashville area. I've been talking to Russ W. online and he turned me on to your blogspot. I want to come out there soon and check your place out. Shoot me an e-mail at barrybooker@msn.com and tell me where you are exactly.
BTW, I forwarded Barry England your beer list and he suggested that you add in O'Douls and delete the rest. Just think. You'll be speaking in chapel soon and they'll be hounding you for donations!
Barry
Now thats some funny S*%T there !!!
Take it as a compliment...AND keep taking her money for your superior product she keeps feeding her thighs with !!! You can take the girl out of the trailer park ....ahh hell you know the rest...I'm still laughing !!!
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